World Spins Madly On
by x DaMsEl in a DrEsS x
Summary: After the prom, Meredith left Seattle, planning to never look back. When she is forced to return after her mother’s death, she finds the world she used to know turned upside down by marriages, babies, and divorces. MerDer, Lexie, Bang, O’Callie, Maddison.
1. I Don't Believe In Fairy Tales

**Title:** World Spins Madly On

**Author:** Holly-Dane

**Rating:** T

**Summary: **After the prom, Meredith left Seattle, planning to never look back. When she is forced to return after her mother's death, she finds the world she used to know turned upside down (marriages, babies, divorces, disaster) MerDer Lexie Bang O'Callie Maddison.

**Authors Note:** I am really excited about this one. I know it's going to be really, really good! I have some great ideas, and I've had so much fun working on this one. I hope you all enjoy it!

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**_Prologue: I Don't Believe in Fairy Tales_**

"Running away will never make you free."

**Meredith (monologue):** Fairly tales...we all believe in them when we're children. We think that they're true; that they can really happen. In fact, we trust in the power of the "dreams really do come true" lie so much that we base our entire future off of it. At the ripe old age of ten, I had already planned out my entire life...my whole future. I envisioned it as being somewhat of a cross between The Little Mermaid and Cinderella. In this fantasy land, I would find my prince charming and he would sweep my off my feet. Of course we would have to face a few obstacles before we could finally be together, but hey, Ariel had to do it in order to finally obtain her "happily ever after" with Prince Eric; didn't she? I though it wasn't a bad deal - I just hoped I wouldn't have to give up my voice.

For years I believed in these imaginary stories, but then one day, it hits me like a ton of bricks...none of these stories could actually happen in real life. There aren't even any princes anymore, and without a prince charming, how can there be a fairy tale? This seemed to be pretty problematic when I was in grade school...but I got over it. I moved on.

Once I had finally come to terms with the fact that my future held no dragons, white knights, or glass slippers, I realized that there was something else to have faith in...true love. It seemed kind of corny to me at first, but after I watched Gone With the Wind on a rainy, Sunday afternoon, my entire perspective changed. I don't quite know what it was about the southern love song that captivated me so intensley, but I was hooked. Maybe it had something to do with the way Rhett Butler looked at Scarlett O'Hara, or maybe it was the way he always appeared to be so debonair, telling the woman that he adored things that every girl dreams of hearing from her true love.

"You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how."

What girl wouldn't want to hear these words? What girl wouldn't want to live in Tara?

These both seemed like formidable questions to me. But there was always one thing that I never understood...how could Rhett walk out on Scarlett? She was, after all, the woman that he loved more than life itself...and he left her. He left her even after she begged him not to. For a long time I pondered this; asked myself how someone could leave the one who stole their heart. Unfortunately, I did find out how...

(Flashback)

"_Meredith." She could feel all the joints in her body freeze the second that Derek uttered her name. The sweat that covered her skins was still cooling off, but she panicked as she sensed additional beads of perspiration forming below her hairline. _

"_Meredith." Fin's voice rang through her ears like the sound of a freight train, ready to barrel into her soul. _

_She looked from Fin to Derek, and then, her heart began to skip several beats; it felt as if any second now, it would crash through her ribs and go flying out of her chest. _

It is during moments like these that we can either accept our fate or deny our heart that which it truly desires. We can run - no, bound - to the one that we love, or we can turn on our heels and run like hell in the opposite direction.

Go ahead; just guess what choice I made.

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I know that this was short, but it's my intro/monologue. So what did you think? Do you like it?

Please leave me a review – it will push me harder so that I can try and post the next chapter this week, even though I have exams! If I get enough reviews, I'll have it up really soon.

Thanks for reading,

**_Holly Dane_**


	2. Miss Halfway

**Author:** Holly Dane

**Rating:** T

**Summary:** After the prom, Meredith left Seattle, planning to never look back. When she is forced to return after her mother's death, she finds the world she used to know turned upside down by marriages, babies, and divorces. MerDer, Lexie, Bang, O'Callie, Maddison.

**Authors Note:** In case you haven't noticed, this story's title, "World Spins Madly On," is named after the song of the same title by the band The Weepies. It was featured on an Episode of Grey's and it's one of my absolute favorite songs. If you want some insight into the story, you should listen to the song - you may find it insightful and enjoyable. Moving on, I kept my promise and delivered. So thanks to all my reviewers, I was really motivated by your reviews, so thank you!

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_**Chapter One: Miss Halfway **_

Meredith Grey sat in the Los Angeles Airport, nervously twiddling her thumbs back and forth as she hummed silently. At least she thought she was humming silently.

"Meredith?" A stern yet calming voice broke her from her uneasy trance.

Meredith snapped her head back in the direction of the man that she had been waking up next to and going to bed with every day for the past two years, "yeah?"

"You really need to relax." He smiled sweetly, his thin lips curling into an encouraging smile. He grabbed a hold of her small hand and squeezed it reassuringly.

Meredith just sighed, "I'm trying, Ryan. I'm really trying."

Ryan laughed, "I know you are sweetie," He was trying so hard to be supportive of the woman that he loved, but he didn't know if there was really anything that he could do to ease her nerves. Meredith was a very closed off person; she liked to keep her emotions inside of her. As long as he had known Meredith, she had tried to disguise the way that she truly felt. Maybe it had something to do with her past, but then again, Ryan didn't really know that much about her past. All she had told him was that she used to be a medical intern at Seattle Grace Hospital, and that her mother was suffering from advanced Alzheimer's. Other than that, Ryan didn't really know much about the woman who he had been spending the better part of the past two years living with. It wasn't that he didn't want to know about her past. In fact, he wished to know everything about Meredith that there was to know, but he had no such luck in divulging these secrets from her.

After a moment of awkward silence, Meredith spoke again, "I don't think that I can see her this way." She shook her head, dirty-blond tresses flinging across her face, "I don't want to see her...dead."

Ryan laced his fingers with Meredith's, before bringing her hand up and lightly kissing it with his soft lips, "Meredith, it's going to be OK."

He could hear her breath hitch in her throat, "I can always come with you. You know that, right?"

Meredith suddenly felt her heart leap in her chest, "No, I don't need you to come!" There was no way that the new man in her life was going to come with her to the place where her true love probably still resided. Meredith didn't want Ryan to ever know about her past with Derek.

"Gee," Ryan laughed jokingly, "If you don't want me to come then..."

Meredith cut him off, "It's not that I don't want you to come...It's that you have that big conference this weekend." She smiled, her puffy eyes fixed on his. "You can't miss it."

Ryan smiled, running a hand through his shaggy blond hair, "You're always looking out for me." After a moment he adopted a more serious look, "But seriously, Meredith, you do know that I would do anything for you...don't you?"

Meredith smiled, her face lighting up slightly, "I know." I felt good to have him say that to her; to tell her that he would do anything for her.

"Now let's get you to that gate." He gave her a cheerful glance before standing up and offering her his hand.

"OK."

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Over at the checking desk, Meredith set her suitcase onto the scale and waited patiently for the old woman working behind the counter to hand her the boarding pass she needed for her flight.

"So," The wrinkled, gray-haired woman said as she turned around, "You visiting family in…." She glanced at Meredith's ticket, "Seattle?"

Meredith smiled, "family." She did have family in Seattle; George, Izzie, Christina, Alex…Derek.

"Yes," She finally replied, "I'm going out to collect my mother's belongings. She just passed away." Meredith felt Ryan squeeze her hand once again.

The old woman sighed, "I am so sorry, honey."

"It's O.K." Meredith smiled gloomily. It wasn't as if she and her mother had the best relationship anyway. Somehow, that was supposed to make it easier, at least that's what Meredith had thought initially. But then again, she didn't know exactly how she would be feeling while she stood in front of her mother's casket, gazing down at the world famous surgeon, Ellis Grey. She would find out soon enough...maybe too soon.

"Well," The elderly woman finally said, "you're all set to go. Have a nice trip."

"Thanks." Meredith smiled

"Thanks." Ryan repeated Meredith's words, kissing her cheek. She wasn't paying much attention to him though, for she was much too busy reading her boarding pass to notice the small peck that she had just received.

Flight 256

Destination: Seattle, Washington

Airline: Midwest

Meredith's hands began to tremble as she read the word, "Seattle." _I'm really going to Seattle, _she thought. _I swore that I would never go back, and yet here I am...I'm in the airport, only thirty minutes away from flying back to Seattle. _

"Meredith," Ryan sounded concerned, "are you alright?"

She tried to regain her voice, "Fine, I'm fine."

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A minute later, the couple stood before the gate onto flight 256 to Seattle, Washington. They both knew that this was going to be the last time that they would see one another for quite a while, so it was hard for either of them to even speak. Their silence seemed too golden to disturb. After a minute, Meredith broke that silence.

"I guess this is where I say goodbye."

Ryan smirked, that playful smirk that he always gave Meredith when he was trying to make light of a situation, "I guess it is."

"I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too," he stated sullenly as he grabbed a hold of both Meredith's shoulders, bringing her in for a hug.

With her head resting on his shoulder, Meredith replied, "I think I have to go now."

"I know." Was all she heard, yet she didn't feel Ryan's grip loosen.

Just as she was about to say something, Ryan pulled away from her and took her delicate face in his hands. The rough skin of his hands felt coarse against her smooth cheeks. "Meredith, I love you...I know you can do this."

Meredith smiled, "I know I can." She didn't really know whether or not that was a true statement, but she didn't want Ryan to worry about her. She had made it this far already without letting him know how truly nervous she was, and she wasn't about to reveal her fears now.

"I love you too." She said after a minute, taking his hands and gently removing them from her face as she stepped away from him. Then, she turned around, knowing that his eyes were still focused on her back, and walked away.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It was hard...walking away from Ryan, even if it was just a temporary thing. He had continuously stood by Meredith's side through the good times and the bad, and for that, she owed him everything. She knew that her leaving was going to be hard on him, but there was nothing that she could really do about it. After all, this was her mother - she needed to go to Seattle, not for herself, but for Ellis Grey. _I have to do this, _Meredith though as she sat silently aboard the Seattle bound plane,_ I need to be there for my mother. _

So with that thought in mind, Meredith leaned back and tried to calm her nerves. She needed to relax, for her sake. This was going to be a difficult trip, she had known that from the beginning, but with each passing minute, Meredith began to realize just how difficult it was really going to be. Her mind was restless, the wheels in her head turning on high gear.About a million questions popped into Meredith's head, all of which she tried to block out.

_I have got to calm myself down_, she though, _everything is fine. I'm fine...I'm good. Maybe I should try and get some sleep...that might help me get all this...stuff off my mind._

Accordingly, Meredith asked the stewardess for a pillow. Propping it behind her head, she lied back, and attempted to relax. After a few minutes, she began to doze off, finally escaping the reality of her life, and drifting off into a world of dreams and memories….

(Flashback)

"_Meredith." She could feel all the joints in her body freeze the second that Derek uttered her name. The sweat that covered her skins was still cooling off, but she panicked as she sensed additional beads of perspiration forming below her hairline. _

"_Meredith." Fin's voice rang through her ears like the sound of a freight train, ready to barrel into her soul. _

_She looked from Fin to Derek, and then, her heart began to skip several beats; it felt as if any second now, it would crash through her ribs and go flying out of her chest. _

_Both men continued to stare at her, causing her palms to sweat, and her breath to catch in her throat. How could she? How could she have had sex with Derek? He was married to Addison…and she was here with Fin. Fin was a great guy; a great guy who had plans...He had plans. _

_Meredith looked from Fin to Derek, and then back again. Both of their stares bore into her. She couldn't take it anymore. She looked to Derek, her attention caught in the glare of his piercing-blue eyes. _

"_I can't." _

_Fin looked confused, "What?"_

_Meredith gave him a solemn glace. _

"_Meredith," He said nervously, "what is it?" _

_Tears began to form in the corners of Meredith's hazel eyes. "I'm so sorry, Fin." _

_Fin shot his attention from Meredith to Derek, "What is she talking about?" His voice was broken down, as if he too were about to cry. But he would never cry in front of either Derek or Meredith, so he held it in, his voice cracking under the pressure. _

"_Derek," Meredith looked into his eyes, "I am so sorry." _

_It seemed like a suspended moment to her. Everything was moving in slow motion, like a dramatic movie scene. She looked to Derek, watching his smile slowly turn to a frown of confusion, and yet grim understanding. She then looked to Fin, whose features bore the marks of a man denied and unloved._

_Finally, after a moment that seemed like an eternity, Meredith turned on her heels and ran...ran like hell. _

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Well, I hope that you like that chapter. I just needed to let you all become familiar with Meredith's current situation before I throw her back in the mix with the Seattle gang. So now you've met Ryan; he is Meredith's boyfriend of two years….but does she love him more than or as much as Derek??? I guess you'll just have to stay tuned.

When she gets back to Seattle things are really going to be rockin' so hold on – it's going to be fun!

Please leave a review and thanks so much for reading,

_**Holly Dane**_


	3. When I Come Home

**Title:** World Spins Madly On

**Author:** Holly-Dane

**Rating:** T

**Summary: **After the prom, Meredith left Seattle, planning to never look back. When she is forced to return after her mother's death, she finds the world she used to know turned upside down (marriages, babies, divorces, disaster) MerDer Lexie Bang O'Callie Maddison.

**Authors Note: **This is where it all starts to unfold…in this chapter. I had to have the first few (more boring) chapters to get everyone acquainted with Meredith's new situation. Trust me, next chapter is going to be really, really good. All the action is going to be starting. I'm so excited!

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_**Chapter Two: When I Come Home**_

Meredith awoke with a start, her breath caught in her lungs. She could feel her heart racing. Blood pumped through her veins so furiously, her wrists throbbed. With a trembling hand, she wiped the sweat from her brow and tried to steady her breathing. This was surely not the time to be having nightmares...especially nightmares about that, what would you call it? Perhaps incident. To Meredith it was more like complete catastrophe.

"I just have to relax." She told herself out loud, taking a swig of water from her Aquafina bottle. "Everything is going to be fine, I just need to make it to Seattle in one piece, get my mother's things taken care of, and then go home...never look back."

This statement of self-assurance made Meredith feel better, but little did she know that "never looking back" wasn't quite an option for her. There was just too much history to run away from. She had escaped her past and her mistakes once before, but this time, it wasn't going to be as easy as just hopping a plane to L.A. and never turning back.

Once Meredith's flight had safely landed in Seattle, she headed over to the car rental service, where - much to her dismay - she spent the next hour and a half waiting for her vehicle and getting car insurance. Things just never seemed to go Meredith's way, and she was dying to get on the road and make a start for her hotel. Once she finally made it to her car, it was already 6:30 PM. _Great_, she thought, _this is exactly what I need...to be checking into my room at 10:00 at night._ She placed the keys in the ignition and delighted at the sound of the purring engine. It was about time. With a smile on her face, and the radio blaring, Meredith Grey drove out of the Seattle International Airport parking lot, and headed straight towards the main highway...towards her mother and the funeral home. At least, that all she thought she was heading towards.

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Meredith now sat behind the wheel of her 1996 Chevy Impala rental, bobbing her head lavishly, the blaring lyrics to Duran Duran's "Hungry Like the Wolf," serving as her soundtrack.

"Stalked in the forest too close to hide  
I'll be upon you by the moonlight side  
Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo  
High blood Drumming on your skin it's so tight  
You feel my heart I'm just a moment behind  
Do do do do do do do dodo dododo dodo"

Meredith chanted the words as if she needed the entire world to hear them. She only stopped now and then, just momentarily to catch her breath, then she continued.

"In touch with the ground  
I'm on the hunt I'm after you  
Scent and a sound. I'm lost and I'm found  
And I'm hungry like the wolf  
Strut on a line it's discord and rhyme  
I howl and I whine I'm after you  
Mouth is alive all running inside  
And I'm hungry like the wolf."

As Meredith continued to sing, her mind wandered to a time not that far back; a time when she had been searching for what she called "complete strangers" that she didn't need to be nice to. These strangers were supposed to be the new inhabitants of her home. She remembered leading the potential roommate search in the waiting room of the hospital, asking people random questions like "What were you doing when the Challenger exploded?"

She laughed out loud at the memory. It had been quite humorous after all' especially when she had asked three or four people who their favorite 80's band was. She remembered hearing them name bands like Queen and Twisted Sister. She had been disappointed by their answers, being more of a "new wave" child herself. She then told her fellow doctors that their answers were basically a load of shit. Come on, it was true. Who would ever pick Twisted Sister over Duran Duran? _I mean, come on,_ Meredith laughed, banging her hands on the steering wheel_, Simon LeBon was way too sexy for you to not worship Duran Duran. What kind of girl doesn't love Duran Duran?_

Meredith suddenly felt empty inside. The roommate search was a funny memory, but of course, it was another memory that brought her back to her days at Seattle Grace.

"I bet Izzie would have picked Duran Duran." Meredith sighed as the song on the radio came to a close.

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By the time Meredith finally reached her hotel, it was 10:30, and she was dragging from exhaustion. Not that it was surprising; she had been traveling all day, not to mention worrying about her mother and boyfriend. So, with legs that felt like jello, and eyelids sinking under the pressure of fatigue, Meredith collapsed onto the comforter of her hotel bed. Never before had she been so happy to close her eyes and drift off to sleep. Her mattress felt like a cloud beneath her petite body; the pillow below her head sinking like a marshmallow under the weight of her face. Tomorrow was going to be a long day, and Meredith knew that her only chance of surviving it rested on the assurance of sleep and energy. So she dozed off, hoping that her dreams didn't once again venture into the realm of nightmares.

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The next morning, Meredith strolled through the large wooden doors of Anderson's Funeral Home with teary eyes and a dead pulse. She wanted to walk on her tip toes, believing that it held some kind of unspoken respect for the dead. Perhaps in death, they liked quiet. It sure seemed that way; Funeral homes were always silent as a graveyard. It made Meredith feel uneasy, especially when she noticed that she was the only person venturing down the long, narrow hallway that led to the main office.

After a moment, she could sense the presence of another individual behind her, so she turned around, ever so slowly, as if moving too fast would cause the person behind her to disappear.

"Hello?"

"Oh, I'm sorry," a pale, slender woman replied, "I didn't know that anyone was in here."

Meredith shook her head, a lump caught in her throat, "It's fine,"

"Ah," The gaunt woman said, as if just remembering something, "Where are my manners? I'm Melinda Anderson...I run this home."

Meredith noticed how Melinda failed to add the word 'funeral.'

"Nice to meet you."

The woman began to walk towards Meredith, causing her withered appearance to become more visible. "Is there something I can help you with dear?" Her dull blue eyes fixed themselves on Meredith's own hazel ones.

"Yeah," Meredith responded, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, "Actually there is...I'm Meredith Grey." She extended her hand to Melinda.

The woman's dead eyes suddenly lit up, "Oh, Meredith...I've been expecting you. I'm very sorry about your mother." She shook Meredith's hand, causing her to flinch from the sheer cold of Melinda's skin.

"Thanks." The statement was bland and unfeeling.

Melinda sighed, "I know it's probably the last thing that you want to do right now, but there is some unfinished business that needs to be taken care of, regarding your mother, of course."

Meredith smiled politely, "Oh, I know."

"Yes," Melinda shook her head slowly, "So, if you would, my dear; follow me."

Melinda started to walk down the dreary hallway, as Meredith lagged behind her. Together, they entered a larger office, full of cold, leather furniture. Meredith took a seat in a large, navy armchair across from Melinda's desk, and together, they discussed the final wishes of Ellis Grey.

Through the conversation, Meredith learned that shortly before her death, Ellis had been lucid enough to sign over her entire estate to her daughter. Everything; the house and the money, now belonged to Meredith – permanently.

After Mrs. Anderson had finished explaining the terms of Ellis death and estate, she stood up and extended her hand to the thing blond woman. "It was a pleasure meeting you Miss Grey. I am so sorry about your mother."

Meredith stood up and slung her purse around her shoulder, "It's fine, thank you for your help." She took Melinda's cold hand and shook it for the last time.

Before Meredith could walk out the door, Melinda's voice reached her ears, "You can go and see her now…if you like. She's in the chapel."

Meredith felt her knees buckle, "Thanks," She replied without even turning around "…I'll go and do that."

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Peering into the open coffin, Meredith could see that Ellis Grey looked more peaceful than she had ever remembered seeing her. Apparently death was kinder to her than life had been. Her red hair was curled loosely, the strands falling lightly upon her shoulders. Her face was pale but surprisingly...

"Peaceful." Meredith let the word roll off her tongue. It wasn't a word she usually used, so her mouth savored its sweet flavor. One thing was for sure...'peaceful' was never a word that Meredith would have imagined using to describe her mother. Yet it was true...Ellis Grey did look peaceful; as if she was finally at rest. Meredith had always thought that the idea of 'resting in peace' was ridiculous, but standing and staring at her mother made her a believer. Perhaps there was a heaven somewhere...and maybe, just maybe, her mother was there right now, finally free...free from the pain that had plagued her in life.

"She looks serene..."

Meredith's entire body tensed at the sound of those three words. The voice speaking them was so familiar, yet she hadn't heard it in years, nor seen its owner. Meredith just wanted to stand there like a statue; pretend that she hadn't heard the voice at all...but she knew that she couldn't. Using all the energy that she still had in her numb limbs, Meredith turned around...

"Hi Chief."

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So what did you guys think??? I'm getting really excited about the next chapter...it's gonna be a really good one; now that I finally have Meredith getting back together with the Seattle Gang. So please leave a review and tell me what you thought...I'd really appreciate it.

Thanks for reading,

_**Holly Dane**_


	4. Homebird

**Title:** World Spins Madly On

**Author:** Holly-Dane

**Rating:** T

**Summary: **After the prom, Meredith left Seattle, planning to never look back. When she is forced to return after her mother's death, she finds the world she used to know turned upside down (marriages, babies, divorces, disaster) MerDer Lexie Bang O'Callie Maddison.

**Authors Note:** I'm very excited about this chapter; I think it's a good one. But first, I just wanted to say, I've seen that a ton of people are reading this story, but not reviewing. **So please, if you're going to read it, just review**!!! It means a lot to me, and really pushes me forward. I really want to know what everyone thinks, and without reviews I can't get that. **And just remember, reviews are what help these chapters get posted sooner, so the more reviews I get, the more motivated I am to continue! **I also accept any kind of review – corrective criticism is ok with me as long as nobody is flaming anything. I also accept reviews from anybody, so just please review.

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_**Chapter Three: Homebird **_

"Hi Chief."

"Hi Meredith." The Chief looked at her as if she was a ghost; a mere mirage that would soon evaporate into thin air. It just seemed like so long ago since the last time he had seen her.

Meredith slowly raised a hand, "Chief…I"

Richard let a small smile dance across his face before interrupting her muffle voice, "It's good to see you."

Meredith bit her lower lip, the pain reaching her nerves like a rocket, "you too." She mouthed the words just above a whisper.

"So..." The Chief said, taking a step forward, "…what have you been up to?" It seemed like an awkward question to ask, but then again, everything did at this point…someone needed to break the ice.

Meredith rung her hands together as she thought of a proper answer, "You know...just trying to rebuild everything I lost." She didn't know how else to respond.

Richard shook his head. He was familiar with the feeling. "I know the feeling." He laughed, and then added "You know...I thought I might see you again."

"Really?"

"Yeah...it was just one of those feelings, you know, intuition." It was strange to think that after all this time, he had been correct. For some reason unknown to even him, Richard knew that he would see Meredith Grey again.

"I'm sorry." Meredith stated simply. She just didn't know what else to say, so she responded with the only sentiment that came to her mind; an apology.

Richard smiled, "For what?"

She knew that he was trying to be polite, but this triggered a small smile from her, "For leaving... for everything." Her eyes were beginning to tear up. She had truly believed that she would never need to see The Chief again; that she would never have to see anyone from her turbulent past ever again. But why? Why was it that she felt unfit to be near the people that she loved – the people that loved her? _Because,_ she thought_, it's too painful._

Richard took another step towards Meredith before continuing, "Meredith...I've just been wondering this whole time…why?" He felt a little bit rude for asking the question, but he did it anyway. He just wanted…no needed to know the answer to a question that had been plaguing him for the past three years.

"Why?" Meredith was perplexed.

"Why did you leave?" He asked, causing her confused gaze to waver.

She stumbled, "because..." She couldn't handle all this, "because of everything...I just left because of everything. All the mistakes I made, all the hurt I was feeling...the hurt I was causing others." She sniffled.

"Meredith."

"I can't" Meredith looked into the Chief's eyes before doing the only thing that came to mind, walking away. She just wasn't prepared to face this kind of ambush. All she had wanted was to look at her mother and move on with her life, not have a nice little meeting with The Chief.

Richard stood in shock for a minute, watching the daughter of his greatest love walk away. He needed to follow her; he couldn't let her go again – at least not without an answer.

"Meredith!" He cried to her fleeting form, "Meredith!"

Hearing the Chief's voice behind her, Meredith began to cry lightly. "I can't do this." She began to walk even faster, approaching the narrow stairwell that she had taken up into the Funeral Home. She began to walk down it, quickening her pace as she heard the Chief's footsteps trailing her. Faster, faster, faster, and then...

"Meredith!" The Chief shouted to the girl who was now sprawled on the bottom step of the stairwell. "Meredith!"

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Everything had gone black the minute that her shoe caught that stair step. Meredith remembered feeling the sensation of free-fall, and then darkness...nothing. It was still dark, but now she could feel her head throbbing. The pain was so great; she wanted to shout...to scream out in agonizing pain, but when she tried to open her mouth and scream, nothing happened. She couldn't move. Not a single bit. It was as if her jaw was hinged shut. She tried to lift a hand, but once again, found that she couldn't. Her body was dead...her limbs were jelly, or perhaps stone. She couldn't tell.

_Help me, please help me..._she shouted these words in her mind, over and over again. But nothing was happening...she could see nothing, feel nothing - except for the extraordinary pain in her skull. As a doctor, she knew that it wasn't a good sign...there was something very wrong, but she couldn't figure out what exactly that was. It was much harder to diagnose an injury when it was on herself. She didn't have much time to think anyway as her vision began to fade; her lungs starting to give out.

"Don't let anything happen to her!" It was the last thing she heard before her consciousness slipped away.

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - _

When Meredith finally awoke, she was overcome by a splitting headache; the worst she had ever felt. _What happened, _she asked herself, reaching a hand up to rub her temples. As her arm lifted higher, her fingertips grazed a large bandage...gauze. Then it all came crashing back into her memory. That's right; she had slipped and fallen down the stair...while being pursued by the Chief.

"Oh no," She said, realizing that she was now sitting in one of the very beds where she had treated her patients at Seattle Grace Hospital...three years ago.

Her state of panic was interrupted by the soft and joyful voice of a young woman, "Hi."

Meredith turned to face the door, and the girl, "Hi."

The girl took a step forward, running a hand through her mahogany-brown curls. "I'm Dr. Philips." She smiled innocently. It was obvious to Meredith that the young woman was an intern; she looked so naïve, constantly peering down at the chart in her hands as if the ink were about to disappear and leave her without reference.

Meredith smiled. Dr. Philips was a very pretty young woman. She looked to be about twenty-five or twenty-six...the same age Meredith and her colleagues had been when they started their tour as interns. Dr. Philips was a very youthful looking girl, with deep brown hair and darkly tanned skin. Her eyes were a sparkling blue - the same color as the ocean, and features were prominent, standing out heavily against her light scrubs.

"Nice to meet you," Meredith said finally, causing the young woman's panicked demeanor to shift into one of more self assurance and comfort.

Dr. Philips smiled, "You too." She took a step forward, "Now, I just have to check that head wound of yours." She finished speaking, setting Meredith's chart down on the table.

Meredith sighed, "Alright." She was quite familiar with the process, only she was used to being the doctor, not the patient.

"So," Dr. Philips said tentatively, "How did you receive this injury anyway?" She flashed her small flashlight over Meredith's retinas twice in a row before focusing on the head wound itself.

Meredith chuckled, but soon stopped due to the pain it caused her head, "I fell down the stairs." It sounded so stupid, like many of the dumb people that Meredith herself had treated.

"Ouch." The bubbly brunette replied, pushing lightly on Meredith's forehead, causing Meredith to wince in pain.

"Yeah," Meredith agreed, it sure was painful. "So," She just couldn't help but let the doctor inside slip out, "Do I have a concussion? A Sub dermal Hematoma? A Perforated Lobe?" Meredith rattled off several head injuries before being politely interrupted.

"You a doctor?" Dr. Philips chuckled as she slung her stethoscope over her neck.

Slightly embarrassed, Meredith looked down at her hands, "Is it that obvious?"

Dr. Philips just grinned, "Yeah, just a little." She hadn't been expecting to treat a fellow doctor, and from what she had heard, doctors made the worst patients. But this woman, Meredith Grey, she was nice.

As if reading the young woman's mind, Meredith looked up and replied, "You don't need to worry, I'm a very forgiving doctor. Trust me, I remember the intern stage."

Dr. Philips grinned, "Thanks, I'm just a little nervous. I always am."

"It's no problem." Meredith smiled.

"You're really nice," Dr. Philips said honestly before picking up Meredith's chart and walking to the door, "Well, I'm going to go and give your charts back to Dr. Karev...I'll be right back."

Meredith felt a surge of energy run through her body...Alex. "Did you say Dr. Karev?" Her lips quivered as she spoke.

Dr. Philips turned around in the doorway, "Yeah...Dr. Karev is great." She then smiled, and walked out into the hallway.

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - _

_Oh my gosh_, Meredith thought, _I'm going to see Alex. After all this time, I'm going to see Alex._ It seemed like forever since the last time that she had witnessed one of his trademark grins or unnecessarily sexual remarks. She laughed...Alex always was good at lightening the mood. Between his smart ass facade and his lighthearted humor, he had always been the one to bring a smile to her face...not to mention the faces of all the other interns. Alex really was a good guy though, not matter how hard he tried to play the ass. Meredith had learned that first hand. Alex had been a good friend to her, and she in turn had been the same to him. In fact, Alex had been one of the few people at the hospital that Meredith felt completely comfortable revealing her secrets to. Maybe it was because they were both sort of 'dark and twisty.'

"Mer."

At the sound of a young woman's voice, Meredith's thoughts were torn form the blurred image of Alex Karev that occupied her memory.

Turning, Meredith saw the owner of the all too familiar voice standing in her doorway, medical chart in hand. It was none other than Dr. Isobel Stevens.

"Izzie!"

"Yeah," Izzie laughed, her pillowy lips curling into a huge smile, "it's me."

Meredith shook her head, "Izzie, I...you're back." The last time Meredith had seen Izzie was right after the death of Denny...right after she quit medicine. So, needless to say, it was downright shocking to see Izzie standing in her doorway – her hospital room doorway – wearing her scrubs, with chart in hand, a huge smile plastered across her face….and a major case of pregnancy!

Meredith lifted a finger and pointed to Izzie's stomach, "You're..."

Izzie cut her off, "knocked up. Yeah."

Meredith smiled, "Wow!"

"Yeah," Izzie laughed, "I know..." Her sentence trailed off.

She didn't quite know what to say next...it had been three years since she had seen Meredith, and they no longer knew anything about one another's lives. "So how have you been doing?" Izzie asked, changing the subject completely.

Meredith gave her a quizzical stare, "Me?" She laughed, "You're pregnant and you want to talk about me...you're not getting off that easily, I need to know about your baby." she stared directly at Izzie's enlarged stomach.

Izzie smiled, "Oh, so you want to know about the baby, huh?"

Meredith pouted, "Well of course I want to know...but first I wanted to ask you a question."

"Ok, shoot."

"Alright," Meredith sighed, "I was just wondering where Alex is."

Izzie shook her head in confusion, "I don't know what you're talking about. Why do you need to know where Alex is?"

"Because he's my doctor," Meredith stated.

Izzie's grin spread even wider, her face illuminating.

"OK," Meredith said, "Alex isn't my doctor?..."

Izzie took a seat on the edge of Meredith's bed, pulling the sleeve of her purple under shirt up to her mid arm. With a glowing smile, she thrust her hand out in front of Meredith, who noticed immediately what it was that Izzie had intended her to see. Izzie's ring finger was adorned with a gorgeous, sparkling engagement ring. Right next to it rested a simple, silver wedding band.

"Izzie," Meredith sighed. "You're…you're married!" She simply couldn't believe it, not after everything that had happened with Denny. "It's beautiful." She peered down at Izzie's ring once more.

"I know." The glowing blond responded, staring down at her wedding ring; spellbound. "I just love him so much."

"So you're…."

"Doctor Karev." Izzie said, relishing the way that her new name sounded.

Meredith was in shock…but good shock. In truth, 'stunned' was the only word that she could possibly think of to describe the way that she felt right now. When she had left, it seemed that Izzie Stevens would never again be the happy, bubbly blond that she had once been. Now, she was just so different; so happy. _Alex really was the one for her,_ Meredith smiled_ ...and now they're having a baby together. God, I've missed so much._

"I can't believe you two actually got married...I would have never guessed." Meredith sighed.

"I bet," Izzie remarked, "Since I was so...you know, dead the last time you saw me." She tried to hide her buried disappointment from Meredith. She had wanted so badly for her to be at their wedding…or to have at least stayed at the hospital, or checked in with everyone.

"I'm sorry Izzie."

Izzie smiled, "You don't need to apologize about Denny, I've moved on...I've let him go."

"So you really love Alex, huh?" Meredith asked, the grin of a giddy schoolgirl spread across her freckle peppered face.

Izzie blushed, "With all my heart...I really do, and now," She sighed, overwhelmed; "now we're having this baby."

"A baby," Meredith repeated, "That's amazing!" The idea of Izzie as a mom was something that Meredith had never really thought about picturing – even in her wildest dreams. It seemed like just yesterday that they had all been sharing a house, and the biggest of their problems back then was 'who's going to buy tampons this week?'

"Yeah," Izzie laughed, "I'm so excited...but a little nervous." She emphasized the word 'little.'

"Well," Meredith leaned forward, taking Izzie's hands in hers, "I think that you'll make a great mother."

"You really think so?"

Meredith grinned, "of course I do, Izzie." she laughed, "Alex on the other hand, I don't know."

Izzie swatted her playfully, "Watch how you talk about the father of my baby."

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - _

Meredith sat in her hospital bed, just contemplating; thinking about all the things that she had missed. Her mother had passed away, from a long and painful case of Alzheimer's, and Izzie had gotten married...to Alex! Things just didn't even seem real anymore. Her world didn't seem real, even though she had left it three years ago.

She sometimes thought about the three years she'd missed as being an eternity, and at other times, those three years seemed like the blink of an eye. It was just now occurring to her those three years had been a long, long time...not just for her, but for the people she had left behind as well. It wasn't that Izzie looked any different. In truth, if there was one thing that those three years of time had done for Izzie, it was make her even more beautiful...which Meredith had originally though was impossible. She was still just as blond as she had always been, and her face hadn't changed a bit. The only thing that was different was her hair. She had put more layers in it, making her golden mane even fuller – and she had added a gorgeous side sweeping bang. Izzie really was stunning, with her flowing tresses of gold, lustrous pink lips, and porcelain skin. But now she had something more...she had the glow of a girl in love. And pregnancy really did look good on her..._I hate her,_ Meredith thought, _She's so disgustingly perfect. _

* * *

Well, there you have it, Chapter 3. I'm really happy to have this chapter up. I thought it was a nice, faster moving chapter. I'm really excited about the next chapter, which is where you will learn a lot about what has happened in the lives of the Seattle doctors.

Once again, please leave me a review. I get really discouraged when I don't get a lot of reviews. So if you're going to read – then review. It just makes thing so much better for the writer. I accept anything you have to say about the story, and I am open to corrective criticism. **So please, just leave a review, it means a lot to me and definitely helps me put chapters up A LOT faster. So if you want to read more, REVIEW! **

Thanks for reading,

_**Holly Dane**_


	5. Just a Ride

**Title:** World Spins Madly On

**Author:** Holly-Dane

**Rating:** T

**Summary: **After the prom, Meredith left Seattle, planning to never look back. When she is forced to return after her mother's death, she finds the world she used to know turned upside down (marriages, babies, divorces, disaster) MerDer Lexie Bang O'Callie Maddison.

**Authors Note: You guys did such an awesome job of review over this past chapter, so thank you! I was so happy with all your reviews; I decided to make this a nice, long chapter. Yay, good for you guys!!! **Ok,so real quick, here's my little review tizzy**Please, if you're going to read it, just review**!!! It means a lot to me, and really pushes me forward. I really want to know what everyone thinks, and without reviews I can't get that. **And just remember, reviews are what help these chapters get posted sooner, so the more reviews I get, the more motivated I am to continue! **I also accept any kind of review – corrective criticism is ok with me as long as nobody is flaming anything. I also accept reviews from anybody, so just please review

**Reviews: **I'm thrilled by the support that everybody has show this story; it makes me so happy. So thank you very much to all those who reviewed, each and every one of you proved to be a huge motivation! I really appreciate it. So anyway, I just wanted to clear some things up – I had several questions asked to me in your reviews, and I would just like to take this as an opportunity to answer the questions posed by some of you.

**ilovepatrick** – First of all, I love your enthusiasm! I'm glad that you asked some questions. So here are your answers (without revealing too much) you will be meeting Derek in a few chapters, but hearing a lot about him before that. You will also find out what happened with Addison, as well as see her in the future. Next, you will learn some things about the interns in the chapter and a lot in the next one too. As time goes on, more and more of the past is uncovered. I want to keep that suspense, lol.

**Kilikina1** – It will be revealed that the surgery was performed by Derek – trust me, this is important!

**Kissedmetillthemorninglight** – Fan of George, eh? Don't worry, there will be a lot about George revealed in the next chapter, and you will also get to see him of course. I couldn't have a story without George – I love him too much.

**IslandGurl90** – I just couldn't help myself; I'm glad that you like my penname. Thanks. :)

I also want to thank everybody else who reviewed, you guys are great!!!

* * *

_**Chapter Four: Just a Ride **_

As Meredith sat silently in her room, dwelling on her past and presumably future, Izzie Stevens ran down the hallway in excitement.

"Hey, where are you going?" A fleeting Christina Yang asked as Izzie sped past her.

"It's Meredith!"

"What?" Christina shrieked, receiving glares from several angry nurses.

"Excuse me," One of them said as Christina began trailing Izzie down the hallway.

"Yeah," Christina said sarcastically, turning around as she walked, "Excuse you."

Izzie laughed, "Christina," She could barely contain her giddy excitement.

"What?" Christina sighed, "They're just nurses." For some reason, all surgeons held nurses in a low bracket of medical care. They were considered the underbelly of the medical staff at Seattle Grace Hospital.

"That makes it so much better." Izzie scoffed, rounding the upcoming corner with increasing speed. She couldn't wait to find Alex and tell him all about Meredith's return.

"So what is this about Meredith?" Christina asked bluntly, completely ignoring Izzie's previous statement.

"Oh," Izzie stammered, "She's here…"

"Here. Like _here, here_," Christina's narrow eyes widened, "In the hospital?" Her mouth hung agape as she waited for Izzie to respond.

Izzie shook her head, "Yeah, _here here_." She stressed both 'here's'.

"Hey," Christina hollered, suddenly realizing something, "you aren't supposed to be running...you're pregnant."

Izzie turned to look at Christina, "We are not running. What we are doing is more like...power walking." She tried to weasel her way out of trouble.

Christina glared at Izzie, "You have a bun in the oven, slow down."

"Fine," With this statement, Christina's hardcore expression vanished, and in its place, one of awe and speculation appeared.

"Where are you heading anyway?" she asked, eyeing the buxom blond inquisitively.

"To find Alex."

"Oh," Christina said mockingly, "of course." It was so like Izzie to go looking for her 'precious' Evil Spawn.

"Well I thought he'd like to know about Meredith." Izzie admitted, causing Christina to stop walking and turn to face her.

Christina glared at her, "and what about me...Meredith's used-to-be best friend, huh?" The fiery Korean pointed to herself as if she were the Queen of England.

"I was going to tell you too." Izzie said, "I just wanted to tell Alex first."

"But I'm Meredith's best friend." Christina blurted.

"And Alex is my husband." Izzie countered, holding up her hand and showcasing her ring, "husband." she repeated.

"Best friend." Christina stated as she began walking again.

Izzie hurried to catch up with her, "husband."

"Best friend!"

"Husband!"

_- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -_

Within a few minutes, Christina and Izzie stood at Meredith's door, lightly knocking, so that they might have her approval to enter.

"What are you doing?" Christina asked, looking at Izzie as if she had just attempted something utterly stupid.

"Knocking," was her only reply.

"We don't need to knock." Christina laughed, ripping Izzie hand from the door.

"But she's asleep," Izzie protested.

"So?" Christina said, walking into the room and lightly shaking Meredith's shoulder.

"Mer…Mer,"

"Huh? What?" Meredith twitched awake, slightly startled by the appearance of Christina that loomed over her.

"Christina!" Meredith screeched.

"Shhh…." Izzie said, motioning for them to quiet down.

"What are you doing here?" Meredith asked, absolutely stunned.

Christina looked at her as if she were smoking something, "To see you of course." She replied, "I mean…it's been three years." She said the number with huge emphasis, obviously a bit angered.

"I know." Meredith said apologetically. God, had she missed seeing Christina; her best friend. It felt so weird to think that she hadn't seen her best friend in three years.

Christina took a seat on the edge of Meredith's bed, "Izzie, close the door." She commanded.

"Why?"

"Because it's not visiting hours…and we want her all to ourselves." She said it as if it were the most obvious fact.

"I came here as soon as I found out you were back." Christina said, leaning forward, dark curls spilling over her shoulders, "Sorry I didn't come sooner…Izzie wanted to go and find Evil Spawn." She added with a slight snarl.

Izzie gave Christina a frustrated glower, "I just thought he'd like to know, too."

"Well he can come later…this is female time, can you feel the estrogen?" Christina asked, looking around the room as if in search for the previously mentioned, invisible aura of estrogen.

Izzie laughed, "Estrogen is all I feel these days."

Meredith smiled, "Well I would think so, with all the extra pregnancy hormones."

"Yeah," Izzie said, pulling a chair forward and collapsing into it, "you have no idea." Pregnancy had, in so many ways, becoming increasingly exhausting. Izzie was beat.

Christina laughed, "I feel for you…I really do, being knocked up sucks."

Meredith giggled at Christina's comment, "I wouldn't know." She was now the only one of the three that had never experienced pregnancy.

"I don't think it sucks," Izzie stated, "in fact, I love it."

"Are you kidding me?" Christina gasped.

"No." Izzie looked at her confused, "why would you ever hate being pregnant?"

Christina started counting the reasons on her fingers, "First, you get fat; second, you cry all the time; third, you have to pee – a lot; fourth, it is painful." She accentuated the last word.

"It's not that bad…" Izzie said, staring into space, "I do have to pee a lot though." She added the latter as a quick afterthought.

"No kidding," Christina chimed, "You're always going to the bathroom, especially since you're so close now."

Meredith looked at Izzie, "I forgot to ask…how soon are you due?" She had been so preoccupied with everything else that was going on, she had forgotten to ask Izzie when her baby was due.

Izzie though for a moment, "It's due on April 15th….I only have another three days of work before I'm forced to go on maternity leave."

Christina frowned, "Maternity leave would literally kill me," She though about the time she was cooped up in a hospital room with her mother, "remember what happened when I was forced out of work for one day?" She added, shaking her head at the mere thought of being forced to experience unending bed rest.

Meredith laughed, "Yeah, with your mom." It was another one of those downright hilarious memories that she kept with her.

Christina laughed, "Don't even mention my mother…what a nightmare. Izzie, I don't know how you're going to survive." She leaned back and ran a hand through her raven's hair.

Izzie shrugged, "I think I'll do fine…I actually like being pregnant. I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want."

"That might me nice." Meredith commented.

"It is," Izzie grinned, "but I feel like a whale."

"Yeah," Both Christina and Meredith sighed at Izzie comment.

"Speaking of food," Izzie said, looking around the room, "Is there any in here, I'm starving." If there was one thing pregnancy surely did, it was make her hungry…very hungry.

Meredith thought for a minute, "Yeah, there's some in that basket." She pointed to the gift that the Chief had left for her.

"Great!" Izzie shrieked happily.

A minute later, she returned to her seat with a Hershey's milk-chocolate candy bar.

"I love chocolate." Izzie muttered to no one in particular.

"Craving chocolate, huh?" Meredith giggled. Maybe chocolate was her pregnancy must-have.

"Definitely," Izzie sighed, taking another bite of the candy bar. "Now that you mention it, I've actually been craving a lot of stuff lately."

"Good job Mer," Christina sighed, "Now we'll be listening to her 'cravings list' for the next five minutes…I've heard it already."

Izzie slapped Christina lightly, "It is not a five minute list."

"Yes it is."

"I want to hear." Meredith nodded her head, breaking their banter.

"Ok," The cheerful blond smiled so wide it looked like her face hurt, "Well, you know, when I was pregnant with Hannah…"

Meredith interrupted her, "Hannah?"

"Her daughter," Christina stated coolly.

"You guys have another kid?" Meredith groaned referring to Izzie and Alex, "Why didn't I know."

"No, no," Izzie corrected her, "I had Hannah when I was a teenager…I gave her up for adoption."

"Oh." Meredith sighed, not knowing what else to say. She had never heard about Izzie's daughter before, and now that she had, she couldn't quite believe it.

"Yeah," Christina said, "I've know about that for a while now."

"Are you boasting?" Meredith laughed, recovering from her stupor.

"I might be."

"Anyway," Izzie interrupted, "When I was pregnant with Hannah all I really wanted was potato chips…lots and lots of potato chips, preferably Doritos."

"Nice." Meredith sighed.

"Yeah," Izzie laughed, "a fat girl's dream."

"Yep," Meredith chuckled, her dishwater locks bobbing up and down.

Izzie smiled and then continued, "So I though that this time would be the same, you know? I thought that I'd be hungry for like one thing… I was so wrong." She paused.

"So what is it that you're craving?" Meredith asked, genuinely curious about her friend's pregnant needs.

"Well," Izzie contemplated the question, "I want pickles all the time…I like to dip them in Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream."

"Eww." Meredith laughed.

"I know," Izzie giggled, "It's nasty, but I love it."

Christina leaned back on Meredith's bed, "That's pretty gross."

"Thanks." Izzie said mockingly before continuing, "And I love the smell of toothpaste….the Crest Mint kind."

Meredith looked at Izzie as if she had just said that the moon was made of cheese, "toothpaste?"

"Yeah," Izzie said stuffing another piece of chocolate into her mouth, "weird, huh?"

"Very." Christina replied, crossing her feet against the nightstand.

"That's what I thought…you should have seen the look on Alex's face when he saw me smelling the toothpaste."

Christina laughed, "I would have loved to see that."

"The look on his face was priceless," Izzie said, remembering the way that Alex's face contorted, showing utter confusion.

"I bet it was…" Christina said, using the tone that she usually used while envying another's surgery, "I would have killed to see that."

Izzie laughed, "Yeah, and it's weird because I never noticed how great toothpaste smelled before I got pregnant."

"Well," Meredith admitted, "It's not something that most people pay attention to."

"I know." Izzie said with her mouth full, "but I crave it…but not nearly as much as I crave sex." She stated boldly.

Christina sat up immediately, "Too much information…" she tried to disguise her obvious interest, being the gossip hound that she was, "sex with Evil Spawn."

Izzie leaned forward, "You have no clue how badly I want sex…all the time, literally. I want it right now."

"Alex must love that." Meredith laughed.

"Oh," Izzie chuckled, "he does."

Christina made a disgusted face, "How can you sleep with him?"

Both Izzie and Meredith turned to her, wide-eyed. Even Meredith realized how stupid the question was; Alex was gorgeous!

"Um," Izzie stumbled, "Are you kidding?"

"No." Christina said curtly.

Izzie just stared at her, "First, he's my husband; second, he's smoking hot;" Meredith laughed, "and third, he is really, really good." She shook her head happily, thinking about it.

"Please," Christina sighed, "Evil Spawn can't be that good."

Izzie shook her head, "Oh, yes Christina, yes he can."

"Oh, _yeah_," Christina said sarcastically, trying to provoke a response from a highly emotional, hormone-filled Izzie. It wasn't that she doubted Izzie at all; in fact she believed her, it wasn't as if she was blind. She knew that Alex was hot, and she didn't doubt his 'abilities.' She just wanted to see what Izzie would say next.

"Well," Izzie laughed, "If you want me to go into detail, then…"

"No!" Christina cut her off. "Would you like it if I talked to you about my sex life with Burke?"

Meredith laughed, "I don't think Izzie would mind."

"I wouldn't." Izzie shook her head, "there was actually a time when I was begging Meredith to tell me intimae details about her tryst with McDreamy." Izzie laughed as if no time had gone by. It seemed like Meredith had never left, if only for a moment. Then, it all came crashing down as she noticed the look on Meredith's face. _Oh no, _she though_, I shouldn't have brought up Derek. _

"I'm sorry…" Izzie trailed off.

"It's fine." Meredith said calmly, trying to look unaffected. But in reality, 'unaffected' was the farthest emotion from reality. The minute she came back to Seattle, the 'Reality Rule Book,' had been thrown out the window and left in the dust.

"Are you sure?" Izzie asked.

"Yeah," Meredith replied, "So about you being pregnant…do you know what sex the baby is?" she asked curiously, but also with a sense of urgency to change the subject.

Christina shook her head, answering the question for Izzie, "She doesn't want to know until it's born."

"Really?" Meredith asked, surprised.

"Yeah," The vivacious girl replied, a huge grin spreading across her face, "I want it to be a surprise."

Meredith leaned forward in her bed, "So does Alex want to know?"

Izzie sighed, tucking a flaxen curl behind her ear, "At first he wanted to know, but when I explained to him that I really, really wanted it to be a surprise, he understood."

"The softer side of evil," Christina said nonchalantly.

Meredith laughed, "Christina, Alex is not evil."

The petite Asian shrugged, "could have fooled me."

"Ha, ha," Izzie faked laughing, "You are so very funny."

"I know," Christina grinned.

"But yeah, he's on cloud nine…he doesn't even care if it's a boy or a girl." Izzie smiled, thinking of how much she loved her husband. _Husband, _she thought, _I love the sound of that…it never gets old. _

Christina couldn't help but smile a little, "You should see him Mer, it's really quite pathetic, I mean he's like delirious with happy. You need to stay away from the two of them or else you may catch the happy…the sheer magnitude of their frickin' happiness is blinding." She warned.

Izzie laughed, "First; there's nothing wrong with being happy, and second; of course we're happy, we're having out first baby."

After a minute, Meredith looked at Izzie, her expression a little nervous, "Can I ask you a question?"

Izzie smiled, "Yeah, of course."

"Did you guys want a baby or did you pull a Christina?"

Christina picked up a pillow and hit Meredith on the arm, "Hey."

"Sorry."

Izzie smirked, "We were trying to get pregnant."

"Really?"

"Yeah, we both really wanted a kid." Izzie stated.

Meredith smiled happily, "Now that's a side of Alex I've never seen."

"I know what you mean." Izzie admitted. Alex wasn't exactly the type of person that one would pick out as a 'want-to-be dad.'

"So is Alex still…you know, all Alexy?" Meredith asked, hoping that the answer was yes. He just wouldn't be Alex is he wasn't.

Without hesitation, both Christina and Izzie blurted, "Yes!"

"If by Alexy, you mean chauvinistic, rude, sexually inappropriate, smart ass…then yes." Christina smiled, "Sorry Izzie."

Izzie laughed, "Don't worry; I was the one who chose to marry him."

Meredith suddenly realized that she hadn't even bothered to ask how long her friends had been married, "Izzie, when did you guys get married, anyway?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Izzie teased, "We've been married for two years - almost….well more like one and a half." She giggled.

"Wow, that's great." Meredith beamed, genuinely happy for both of her friends.

"I think so." Izzie smiled.

"Spare me." They both looked over to Christina, who sat with her arms crossed in annoyance.

"We missed you at our wedding." Izzie finally said, wanting to let Meredith know her obvious disappointment.

"What wedding?" Christina laughed, "You guys got married in the hospital!"

"No!" Meredith shoved Izzie's arm playfully, "You got married in the hospital?"

"Yeah," Izzie said her extravagant lips curling into a smile, "we did."

"Why?"

"Well," Izzie said leaning back in her chair, "it's actually quite a long story."

Meredith laughed, "In case you haven't noticed, I have nothing but time." Her question had been innocent enough, but she had no clue how dramatic an event it had been for both Christina and Izzie.

"Right," Izzie smiled, embarrassed, "Well, I was finally getting over my stage of Denny induced depression, when there was a 911 page for all of us to head to the scene of a huge explosion." Izzie paused, noticing Meredith's interest in the story, "a passenger ferry had set on fire in the middle of the water. We all headed over to the scene in copters. It was the most terrifying thing I had ever seen...hundreds of people were burned; tons of people were already dead." Izzie looked over to Christina, who was obviously remembering the horrific event; her face was pale, "So anyway, we were in one of the choppers when a fuel line or something in the ferry set on fire and exploded. The helicopter lost a wing, and we went into the water. It was during winter, so the water was like ice. It was me, Alex, Christina, and George. We were all in there, with a couple of burn victims." Izzie stopped again, as if some of the memories from that day were still painful to her.

Christina grabbed a hold of Izzie's hand; being more supportive than usual, she continued for Izzie, "We were all in the water, freezing...the water was so cold, it felt like we were being stabbed with thousands of knives, " She shivered, "Well, Izzie had gotten hit with a piece of debris, right in the head. She was sinking fast...Alex went in after her...George and I climbed up onto one of the wings, and tried to calm one of the patients who we pulled up. We just sat and waited...George was freaking out, he though Izzie and Alex were dead and even though I would have never admitted it to him at that moment, I did too. The water was just too choppy...too cold." Christina looked Meredith directly in the eyes before continuing, "I don't even know how long it was...it seemed like forever, but Alex finally came up with Izzie. She was bleeding like crazy...but head wounds will do that. He thought she was dead...she wasn't breathing. He started to give her mouth to mouth while holding her in the water, but he was so exhausted, so I offered to take over but he told me 'no.' He just wouldn't give up." Christina remembered watching Alex tread water with a bloody and limp Izzie Stevens in his arms. He was holding her close; clinging to her for dear life as he tried to breathe life into her. Her hair had been matted with blood, and her skin had lost all color; she was white as a ghost. "After a few minutes, another helicopter arrived, and we all got in...Izzie was still out, but Alex kept going, trying to save her. We all thought she was gone…but by some miracle, she started to choke on a bunch of water. She spit it out and started coughing. Alex was holding onto her, and they were just crying. She was shivering like crazy, and the rescue team covered here in blankets to try and get her temperature up. She was just about to pass out when she just, out-of-the-blue said 'Marry me.' – then she fainted."

Meredith looked to Izzie in complete shock. She couldn't believe the story that she had just been told. It seemed so impossible.

"Izzie…" Meredith sighed, taking her hand and squeezing it lightly.

"It's amazing, I know." Izzie laughed, wiping away a small tear that had formed at the corner of her warm, brown eye. "Sorry," She apologized, "it's all the damn estrogen."

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Well, there you have it, Chapter 4. I really hope that you guys liked it**. Once again, I would really love it if you guys reviewed after reading – it motivates me so much. So if you want another long chapter, or another quick update – Review. Simple as that.** Next chapter will build on what you just heard in this chapter, so be ready. Ok, please - review, review, review. I accept corrective criticism, and I would also love to know what you guys thought!

Thanks for reading,

_**Holly Dane**_


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